I’ve unlocked my villain era. I mentioned this to a few people and no one tried to stop me. No one offered an alternative. In many ways, there was a sense of relief in their response. I’ve come to realize the power in my rage. I used to think that being unlikeable would be my downfall when it’s actually my authenticity that has maligned the wrong people to my space. So much brainpower is spent on convincing people to accommodate others who don’t have their best interest at heart that we fail…
“I can’t want it more than the people above me.” My BFF casually mentioned this in a conversation and it struck a nerve with me. So much of my work as a strategist has been about empowering others to acknowledge and embody their potential, against their own self-sabotage. I’ve always felt like I’ve wanted their success more than them…more than my own. “Maybe it’s a trauma response” is always how I talk myself out of emotional overwhelm because something in me felt a need to justify my worth…
I’m in a graduate program that I am doing virtually and I never want to hear criticism that online programs are the easy way out. There is nothing easy about spending hours to write a thorough and fleshed out elaborate discussion post and lose points because you forgot to include citations in the responses. I got 3 hours of sleep last night and just had a cookie to help with my dreams. I’m beyond exhausted and get to spend my days with an organization that inspires me to resume freelancing…
I need to come up with a better opening than “hola mi digital gente” because it sounds so much like the person I used to be and it doesn’t reflect where my mind is at right now. Maybe something like “yo, you ready to burn some shit down today?” I’m tired and I know I’m not the only one. We’re all making lemonade out of fuzzy lemons, trying to justify why not to throw it out even when it’s toxic to the core. I’m sitting at the train station in Secaucus because I took the train on track 10…
If you are new here, I am a hard core Yankees fan. Devout AF and unapologetically competitive. I still root for the Mets though and I’m writing this as they play game 3 of the NLCS. My boys in the Bronx are chillaxin’ right now and looking at all of the turtlenecks and coats, Queens peeps are chillaxin’ with the cold too. It’s been a hot minute since we last connected and so much has happened since I ranted. I am still working a FT job while juggling grad school,…
