Day 5

Don’t mind me. It’s Sunday and even our maker (whoever he/she may be) rested on this day. These entries are delivered 1 day behind so I’ll always post for the previous day, in case there’s any confusion.

Saturday was a blur. Shopping and coding offer a great distraction until it’s time for dinner. To have cheese or not to have cheese?

Well the answer would be “to not” because cheese is on the no-no list, so carbs it is. Grubbing it up becomes easier when there are no triggers around. It’s easy to forget something when you don’t see.

Out of sight and out of mind really has something to it.

And then there was….ice cream. I must admit that I was awfully proud of myself. Sticking to a goal feels good when you actually, well, stick to it, cheat-free. But sitting at the dinner table I couldn’t help but wonder….

What exactly is willpower?

I could eliminate all opportunities to break my goal. But what happens when I’m surrounded by the very thing I’m seeking to avoid? Is willpower to ability to resist temptation or the ability to remove triggers?

I don’t feel stronger when I avoid something. It almost feels like cheating, to be honest, and if that’s the case how authentic would the sacrifice be? But to sit in the lion’s den and face all temptation head on, and having the mental strength to still say no – there’s a feeling to that which can’t be described.

Sacrificing is not overrated. Imagine if it were easier and we could all sacrifice freely. A few inappropriate comments this weekend and I realize that we, as a society, don’t understand sacrifice.

We live in the reality of now.

Any struggles that we experienced are inflicted by the other side of wherever we stand. And it’s not just political lines. It goes across the board. If we all had to give up something, even the smallest luxury, then perhaps we can have a society which understands sacrifice and respects those who live without on a daily basis.

Ice cream today represents a lot. If I can turn down cookies and cream today than perhaps tomorrow I can turn down other vices.

Change starts with a decision, one that is rooted in a commitment to trying something else.

Pain is only as strong as the power you give it.

Sacrifice is only valuable when you decide that it’s more important to just let something go than it is to hold on.